That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
that may or may not have been my penis.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
