For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
