i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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