The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
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