Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just gargled with NyQuil
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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