she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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