BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize