toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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