I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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