Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize