So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
