conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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