Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
