Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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