Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
