Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
