I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Blood and glitter go together right?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
