id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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