Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
