Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
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