you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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