That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
