I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
