Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize