im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize