I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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