Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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