she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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