meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
