Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I could make wine with my vomit
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
