I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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