we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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