is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize