i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
