OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
