its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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