We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
