She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
