Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize