I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
wat bout pragnant strippers??
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize