He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
