and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
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