she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize