return my video game
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
