The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Sext me about skeletons
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
