Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
