So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize