no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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