ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
drinking out of a sandbucket again
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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