he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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