how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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