How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
